Writing
A lot of these older songs, I don’t remember what was happening when I wrote them. This one, however, has tells. First off, I have the original prose, jotted down on scrap paper from my job. Oh yes, I was at work when I wrote this one – and I remember. The next, is the date: 12/3/2013. Twenty-thirteen was not a good year for me, and October and November brought news that crushed me. “I wrote that then?!!!” In some ways, I am amazed anything beautiful came through me in that dark month. But reading the tone of the song, it does make perfect sense. I would be in-tune with great disappointment in those days. 
On the original paper, like many songs, I wrote what would become the chorus first. I don’t know when I typed it out, but I moved the first chorus after verse one at that time. But all it did was sit like that, until 2017 or 2018, I guess. At that time, I started playing with the words on the page, and began putting chords in the key of Em to birth it from a poem to a song. I liked where it was going, but what was then the third verse, didn’t fit nicely into the pattern. “interlude?” I scribbled next to the stanza. I didn’t know what to do, and I gave up. (There are some other songs sitting like that in a notebook…)
In 2022 I perceived from the Lord that I should start spending time on music, specifically writing, recording, and a website. I semi-tried to do these things, and also semi-tried to not do them. Honestly, I didn’t want to share any music with anyone. But I really wanted to be obedient. In fall of that year, I picked this song back up to finish up the chord progression… and it worked. I did turn the (original) third verse, into an interlude (or perhaps a post-chorus), and the chord pattern I had for verse one and two fit for the fourth and fifth verse. I even threw that sole G-chord into the bridge – with the intent to move into happy chords by the second chorus. Heh, that didn’t pan out. Instead, I went straight into a B7-chord! But, the bridge did go somewhere – bringing 
us from the dark side of weeping and misunderstanding into rejoicing and revelatory hope.
After finally crafting the song, I played it through, sensed holy spirit, and was so pleased that I claimed “this is what I was born for!” But then, of course, I wrote a song too hard for me to play. I am not sure I believe that now, but in the moment, yes. I love this song even though I haven’t accomplished making it sound on a recording how it sounds in my head. It took me over a year to get a recording. Such a fight. “Why do I write songs I can’t play?!” I tried to get this song recorded by Christmas 2022. Then by Resurrection Sunday 2023 – because after all, it is a great Creaster (Christmas-Easter) song. If I could play it right the recording equipment didn’t work. Bought new recording equipment, then my computer didn’t work. Such a fight! But you have something now, because hate the recording or not, I wanted this available as a Christmas present for everyone.
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Content
It is Psalm 137 “How shall we sing the Lord’s song” that captures the feel of sorrow that was so deep, the captives of Judah could not sing. And though they were permitted back to their land by Cyrus, they suffered 400 years of silence after Malachi, until the bright light came – the star in the sky leading to Jesus in Bethlehem. Even that promise perfectly (through immaculate conception) fulfilled the “seed of a woman” promise given to Eve by God, it didn’t look like the promise most people were expecting. Jesus waited 30 years before he did anything. I have a lot of thoughts about that as I have meditated on it this year. Jesus, a man born without Adam’s seed of sin, who put away his Godliness so that he could be tempted in every way. If the woman’s seed carried sin, then Jesus couldn’t have lived a pure life. I will hold the rest of that train of though for now, since they don’t pertain directly to this song. Jesus as a babe, Jesus as a teen, Jesus as a man, Jesus the teacher, Jesus the miracle-maker, Jesus dying on a cross…. Even cousin John the Essene questioned at his end if Jesus was really the promised one. Expectations were crushed, deconstructed, and dissolved. In the misunderstanding, For moments they thought he was the Promised One, but then he was tried and hung on a tree. A crushing blow to hope.
“What are these words and why are you sad” said he to the two on the road to Emmaus. ”Slow to believe what the prophets spoke.”(Luke 24) He returned, revealing what he had learned. Restoring hope, and proving himself as the Anointed One. His kingdom is coming, and all things are being restored! It is time to rejoice and put away the weeping.